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Automatic Writings

Fear For You

I fear you’ll be lost forever.

I fear we’ll never get that magic back.

I fear that time is running out.

I fear feeling like we had our masterpiece stolen from us.

I fear we’ll never have another chance.

I fear you’re too blind for that, now.

This fear arises as the blockages are removed.

This fear arises now that I can see, what was really happening.

I fear not knowing how precious every moment is.

I fear being so consumed by the momentum of life that I’m unable to see things for what they are.

I fear being the only one to come out on the other side of this.

I fear the temporary nature of a precious alchemy.

I fear that you’ll never see the light, and that I’ll never get my friend back.

I fear doing nothing in spite of this.

I fear doing something despite knowing better.

I fear what’s become of you.

I fear why the first responders had to storm your house that day.

I fear you’ll never be able to pull yourself out of this black hole, that you’ll never even come to see.

Life is stolen from you when you’re consumed by what isn’t.

And it’s also given away.

It’s stolen from the person that doesn’t know any better.

It’s given away freely by the person who does.

A desire to change things, is a dangerous desire.

One must walk softly, with trepidation.

To surrender one’s own, reactive desires . . .

In light of the bigger picture . . .

Which may never come to be, nonetheless.

There’s only one thing that matters in this life.

I fear you’ll never come to see that, until it’s too late.

I fear that it’s a virtual certainty.

I fear recognizing this need in myself.

I fear being disappointed.

Because I feel there is a way.

But nothing is for certain.

All that is certain, is myself.

And even that is uncertain.

But in the quiet of my solitude, the truth will come out.

And so I fear the spotlight being shone on me, and only me.

When in my mind, it was supposed to be shared, between you and I.